New Beginning
by tyrzgz
Summary: Dan's life after "unforgettable break up". He goes to Rome. He tries to start everything all over again. This story is kind of appreciation for Dan Humphrey as a character. Probably other characters will appear in this. Story for Dan's supporters and Dair shippers. Multi-chapter. I hope.
1. Chapter 1

**New Beginnig is my own idea of Dan's life after "unforgettable break up". I'm not fan of GG. I only adore Dan Humphrey as particular, individual character. **

**I do not own GG or any of its characters, fortunately.**

**I wanted to write something about warm-hearted man, and choice could be one.**

**I'm not a writer. It's my first and last story. It's only to improve my English skills, because English isn't my first language.**

**If someone will decide to read it, I ask kindly for forbearance.**

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**New Beginning**

Chapter 1

Why the cruelest things happen to the most fabulous people? Why good people have to suffer the most? It's simply not fair, everyone knows that. But this is one of those rules which universe will never break. Unchangeable reality.

Daniel Humphrey convinced himself about it not once or twice, but this time is different - the special one, really painful and destroying. Dan never made of himself a victim. He never blamed a world about his problems or failures. And he doesn't do it now. But something has changed inside of him. For a first time he lost a faith in humans, love and goodness. He realized that last couple of years of his life were pointless, were wasted with unscrupulous, vain, selfish and completely insensitive people.

He was broken or rather devastated and simply very, very sad. He lost love of his life. However surrealistic it sounds, Blair Waldorf was love of Dan Humphrey's life, his soul mate. Unfortunately without reciprocity. He never was so invested in any other relationship before.

He lost not only beloved women, but also friends and family. Dan thought that he had it all. In that moment he truly doubted in it. _How is it possible, that I lost something, when I never had it_. He wondered, _It's ridiculous_. The worst thing is that he lost himself in some way. _Who am I now?_ He asked himself.

Dan and Rufus tried to support each other… with no results. Surprisingly or not Jenny became a person who knew what to do for two most important men in her life. She is in Tokyo, leads a good life, and works as a fashion designer in one of Japanese brand. She creates there her own line – clothes, bags, shoes signed _J. Humphrey_, and prepares the newest collections. All of her fashion shows are always a huge success. She is doing what she wanted, what she dreamed about whole life. Her talent is good enough to let her be successful. She doesn't need the rich relatives or connections for that. This skinny, pretty girl used to be insecure and scared; now she became even more beautiful, confident, independent and strong woman. Capable to move her life forward and help her brother and father do the same with theirs. When she heard about UES disaster, she called Rufus and Dan immediately. They talked, all three of them, for hours on Skype that night. The most important part of conversation was initiated by Jenny.

„Dad I think you should take this job in recording studio in San Francisco. Music is a big part of you. You could work with new people, bands, musicians, in place where you don't have bad memories. There you could create new ones. It's opportunity to make a dream come true and be fully satisfied with your life. And, in my opinion, you sacrificed yourself for other people for too long. It's enough. Do something for you dad, I mean it" She said persuasively. „Don't even try to convince me that you are fine now and that you were fine before. I know that you don't regret your decision about raising us and being with family, instead of developing career, being on tour or writing songs. I'm proud of you, I love you and I thank you for being the best father. But is your time now." She added, ending her monologue.

Rufus was speechless after those words of his daughter. He doesn't even hide tears. „Ohh my smart, little girl. I'm so sorry that you have to be worried about old father. And I'm so sorry that I disappointed both of you."

„You don't disappoint us!" they yelled together.

Rufus nodded and hugged his son and left a room with good byes for his children. „I love you Jenny. I love you Dan."

Siblings scanned each other for a second, during laptop's screen.

Dan started „Well, well, well since when are you so mature hyh?" He asked with a broken smile. „I think Hamptons and travelling around the world helped you a lot."

„Perhaps. I think being far away from Upper East Side helped me more." She noted. „Thank you Dan."

„Me? For what?" He asked with surprise.

„You released me. This place was poisoning me. You are so understanding, caring, protecting and patient all the time to me. You always know what is better for me. Dan, you are my best friend. Only person I can trust, rely on. I will never be grateful enough for everything what you do for me. You care about my happiness more than about yours. Now it's my job to care about you."

„If you thing I will stop helping you and supporting you, you are wrong. Jen I'm here for you. Always" He replied.

„See, you do it again. You are suffering. Your heart is crashed by enormous pain, and you instead looking for rescue, offering me a help. This time I'm here to helping you, understood."

„Jenny please, you exaggerate a little. I'm fin…" he didn't have a chance to finish the sentence.

„Stop it now! I know you better than you think. Don't hide your feelings from me. I read _Inside_. You love her more than Serena, Olivia and Vanessa together. It sounds unbelievably, but it's true and you know it. I was skeptical about this relationship, euphemistically speaking, I warned you against it."

„Yeah. I remember what you went through because of them. But she made me happy, the happiest actually." After couple seconds of quiet, he continued more openly. „I have no idea what to do now, Jenny. What if I stay like this forever... You know miserable" He said almost whisper. „I can't imagine my life without Blair."

„I hate to admit it, but it's true she made you happy. I never saw you happiest." She paused. "Believe me Dan I can imagine how it hurts, that's why you have to find a cure, otherwise it will kill you from inside. I can promise you one thing, you will not stay miserable. You will find a person who will deserve you, accept you and love you more than anyone. I'm sure it will happen. Your future will be empty of garbage and pain, and full of joy and luck, next to extraordinary women. I can bet if you want." She smirked.

"Why not. I can't wait to see your loss. My life is worth, hmm 10 dollars, so I think it's fair rate." He said sarcastically.

"Ohh, I smell sarcasm. It means you are on the good way. Just stop over-thinking and… being dumb. You are worth more, gorgeous. Maybe 20." She laughed. "Sooner than you think on my bank account will be extra 20 bucks." She stopped joking, when Dan sighed. "OK. I'm serious now, if you don't want to talk about it, write it down. Maybe writing will give you a bit of relief. And finally the most important thing, Dan please go to Rome. Change scenery, see this situation in a different perspective. Rest and get strength and energy far away from New York City. You will meet new, creative, bright people. It's great opportunity to pull yourself together."

„It all sounds reasonable but it isn't that simple for me." He said sadly, breathing heavy, with eyes directed to the floor.

„It's not easy but necessary. You need **New Beginning**, both of you. Thanks to you I started all over again, and I will never thank enough for that. You deserve to be happy. To get it, you should start changing your life right now."

They ended the conversation with thanks, iloveyous, good lucks and invitations. Later Dan and Rufus met in the kitchen talking about Jenny, how she grown up and became impossibly strong and mature.

She texted them meanwhile: _I stand by you. Anywhere, anytime. Love Jenny._

They decided. „We have to take these chances." In the morning, Dan escorted Rufus at the airport. „Have a safe trip! And call me when you land." Dan told. And one of Humphrey's men flew on the other side of country, to San Francisco, to repair his life.

One week left to the Dan's flight to Italy. In the empty loft all bad thoughts returned immediately. According to Jen's advice, he started writing. During 5 days and 5 nights in Brooklyn's loft was available only one sound – clicking on the laptop's keys. After he wrote last word, he packed and exhausted but with peace of mind was on his way at the airport.

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„Sir. Please wake up. Welcome in Rome." Dan heard nice voice of flight attendant, who poked him gingerly.

„Oh I'm so sorry." Looking around he noticed that he was alone in a plane and stood up quickly. „What a short flight." He smiled taking his hand luggage.

„Not really, it's almost 10 hours. You just slept during whole journey. You must be very tired." She said politely leading him to exit.

„Well. Last week was pretty hard, a lot of work. No time to sleep. I hope you don't have troubles because of me. I'm so sorry again. I'm promise, I'm gone in a flash." He smiled.

„Please don't worry. It's my job. Have a nice time in one of the most spectacular city in Europe."

„Thank you. I wish to have." He said unsteadily. „Good bye."

„Good bye."

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He reclaimed his baggage. And stood in the middle of a terminal of Leonardo da Vinci–Fiumicino Airport. He hesitated a little bit. _Maybe it's not good idea. It's still time to back down._ But he didn't do it. Instead he took a long, deep-sounding breath and headed for big, glass, automatic door.

"I'm so, so, so sorry!" he heard from a girl after she bumped on him accidentally.

"Never mind. It's nothing. I'm OK. Let me help you." He started collect her scattered things.

"You don't have to, really. It's my fault. You are in hurry probably. I don't want stop you."

"It's not big deal."

When they stood up, she thanked him countless number of times, said good bye, shared honest smile and went in opposite direction.

_Wow._ He thought.

He looked on the piece of paper with an address, and waited patiently for a taxi.

Dan didn't know yet that **New Beginning** started just there.

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TBC, I hope.


	2. Chapter 2

**I do not own GG or any of its characters, fortunately.**

**As always, I ask kindly for forbearance.**

* * *

**New Beginning**

Chapter 2

_Dan! Dan Humphrey! _Someone called out.

Dan heard it and turned around with his surprised face. He saw tall, corpulent man around 30, with tanned skin, dark hair, a little beard and characteristically Roman nose. He looked like a stereotypical Italian man.

"_Bongiorno_ Daniel. I'm Fabio Cassanero." He greeted with Dan by a handshake. "_Bongiorno_! Nice to meet you." Dan smiled. "Welcome in Rome. I'm happy you decided to take part in our project. I work in Literature Institute and I'm going to escort you to your apartment." Man introduced himself with strong Italian accent.

"No, I should thank you for an invitation. How could I not take such an opportunity." Dan said politely with a smile. "What do you mean apartment?" he asked after the moment. "I thought we will live in campus maybe in hotel… Those were arrangements, initially. I have even an address." Dan showed to Italian man a piece of paper which he has in his hand. "It's only couple weeks, by the way."

The man seemed to be a bit confused. "First of all, I will help you with bags." He grabbed Humphrey's luggage without hesitate. "Please follow me to a car. It's few steps from here." Fabio showed a direction to his guest, pointed his finger at silver Lancia. Meantime, when they walked together, a conversation went on: "This address is out of date, for sure. Did you check your mails lately?" he asked. "Schedule, form and… time of lasting of this writer's program are changed."

Dan stopped putting bags to a trunk and stood still next to a car. _What is going on? I'm starting to worry. _"Yyyy. Honestly, I receive only bad news recently, so I'm avoiding my computer and iPhone. I'm offline purposefully. I don't check any letters or messages. My mistake. I'm sorry." He said openly.

"No worries. It's nothing scary. Get in the car, during a drive I will try to explain to you everything."

And he did. It turned out that changes were considerable. Literature Institute, School of Film and Art Academy started to cooperate.

"Listen to me, Dan." Fabio said. "Project for young, good promising writers has been connecting with program for talented actor or actress and with program for painters or photographers. People around the world from different branches of art and with other interests have been mixed with each other."

"Mixed with each other? What do you mean Fabio?" Dan asked carefully.

"That only means that you will live with actress, painter and photographer from various countries in the apartment. That is all. It's about 'inspiration and motivation'. Everything else is the same. You will meet and work with writers. It still includes lecture and kind of classes for improving your skills." He said, tried to calm Dan a little. "But it will last a little bit longer…" he suspended the voice. "Twelve months."

"Year?!" Dan raised his voice. "Are you kidding me?! I'm not prepared for such a long time here."

"_Mamma mia_ Daniel!" he said helplessly. "You will live in one of the most beautiful part of Rome called _Quartiere Coppede_, located away from the hustle and bustle of the city canter, in a amazing old building, which architecture combines elements of art deco, baroque and mannerism, you will feel there Middle Ages and even ancient Greece, completely for free. Is an experience like that available in United States? I don't think so." Fabio stopped his speech for a minute. "Your only duty is write novels, eat amazing Italian food and take a rest. It's heaven on earth. And don't even try to say that Italian people can't care about artists and their brain wave." He ended with a smirk.

After a second thought Dan agreed with a driver. "You are right. It couldn't be any better. I have nothing to complain about. The longer I will be outside New York, the better."

"Now I like your words. Here you have your new address and names of roommates." He gave to Dan a piece of paper with a list of names.

_Daniel Humphrey – writer, USA; Gustavo Gonzalez – painter, Argentina; Pola Winiarska – photographer, Poland; Emma Waters – actress, South Africa._

"Wow. There are people not only from different countries but also from different continents_._ It's great, really great. It's an occasion to learn about other cultures, customs, and languages. We can get to know new thing about the world and break down stereotypes. Excellent. I waited for that." Dan said. "I hope it help me overcome my writing blockade."

"Bravo. That is the main point of the project." Fabio parked the car on the sidewalk, in front of the orange building. "Here we are. It's your home for the next year." He pointed at the magnificent house with a garden. "Your keys. People from Argentina and South Africa will arrive in a next week, as yet only you and girl from Poland will be here."

"Oh my God. Are you sure it's right place?" Dan asked incredulously.

"Yes! Stop being so surprise all the time. Go and choose a room, until you are alone." Fabio ordered during taking out the bags. "_Arrivederci_!" he said, getting in the car.

"Bye Fabio. Thank you for a ride and help."

Fabio just saluted and drove away.

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Dan opened a wicket and stepped on the path made by stones. Near the fence on both sides, grown beautifully smelling elder, two kinds of this tree: white and purple. In the right corner, was a small terrace with a wooden, rocking bench, a table and few chairs. Huge lawn was evenly mowed.

_Wonderful._

Dan turned around once, totally amazed. Sky was blue, birds sang, pure nature in the middle of big city. Perfect place to work and create.

_Idyll._

He jumped on the steps and approached to an oak, carved door with petite, vertical, stained glass. He opened it and saw a spacious hallway with stairs.

"Hallo?! Anybody is here?!" He asked just in case. He didn't get an answer.

Dan looked around. On the ground floor were three rooms; a living room – really big one, in the middle were two flowery sofas with pillows and matching armchair and mahogany coffee table, next to a door was commode, a little further was bookstand, everything was from the same set. Walls was cream-colored, on one of them hang a picture depicting a still life. Between the big windows stand a rack with flower bowl on it. Fabric of curtains was similar to this on the couches. Kitchen was also fully furnished and equipped, everything was brand new and ready to use, starting to oven and fridge ending to cups and cutlery. A bathroom looked impressive too. Tiles was dazzling white, there were sink, mirror, toilet, shower and washing machine. Dan guessed that upstairs probably was a bigger bathroom. And he wasn't wrong.

_I can't believe it_.

He had no problems with choosing a room. First one was too large. For the painter and his easels would be more suitable. Second one with huge wardrobe was definitely for girls. He moved into third one with big desk and couple of shelves. This one was definatelly accurate for him. To fourth he didn't even step in. He started to unpack.

_I'm starveling. I should buy something to eat._

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When he came back, door was open. That's meant that expected mate was there. He went to the kitchen to left his shopping. It seems that someone prepared to cook. He moved toward stairs. Upstairs, Dan heard water in the bathroom. From a repealed door in an adjacent room, he could see suitcases and photographic equipment.

"Oh… Hi!" Girl said, gathering a robe around her nervously.

Dan turned around and saw a woman with towel in her head and in wet robe.

"I'm Pola Winiarska." She held out her hand to him to greet.

"Hi! I'm Dan Humphrey. Nice to meet you."

"I'm sorry for 'this'." She pointed on her whole appearance."Fabio told me that you are already here and I hoped that I made it before you back." She smiled and looked suspiciously. "Didn't… didn't we meet earlier…, at the airport? Yes! Of course, you helped me collected my thing from a floor." She clapped her hands.

"That was you? Factually! I didn't recognize you in this outfit." He smiled.

"I have to repay for this. You must be hungry, so do I. Just give me a minute and I will cook something for us." She suggested convincingly.

"Really you don't have to do this. It's not necessary."

"I don't accept a refusal. One second and I'm in the kitchen." And she disappeared in her room.

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What she said, she did. Pola made pasta with fried vegetables and meat, and with feta cheese. And they ate at the kitchen table, sitting opposite to each other.

"This is delicious. Thank you. You have to give me a recipe."

"It isn't big deal. I'm happy that it taste you. Recipe is very simple you add and combine everything what you have in the fridge. My friend Karolina told me about it. We called it 'student dish' because it's cheap, simple and nutritious. Everyone can quickly do this after all day classes."

"Clever." He smirked.

"Yeah, well." She improved her cardigan playfully.

"You are from Poland?" Dan asked.

"Yes I am from the most beautiful but a little forgotten country called Poland." She said proudly. She stood and took plates.

"No. Leave it. I will wash the dishes." Dan objected, put plates into a sink and grabbed a washing-up liquid.

"It's June, it's Italy and I'm cold a little, weird. Do you want some tea? We could drink together in the living room." She asked timidly.

"Yes. Why not. Thanks." He answered.

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They sat and talked for awhile this evening. Dan sat comfortable in the middle of the couch with the cup on the pillow. He wore dark jeans and bright shirt with wrapped sleeves to the elbows, as usually. Pola squatted on the armchair with blanket on the laps and the hot cup of tea in her hands. She wore light make-up and had slim jeans, white T-shirt with ACDC print and black cardigan. Dan couldn't deny that she was beautiful woman – slim body, pale skin, dark, wavy hair little bit longer than to shoulders. Her face was oval, cheeks full, eyebrows black. He noticed her spectacular brown, big, bright eyes with really long eyelashes, even without mascara and adorable laugh. Yes, she beamed and laughed a lot. Actually, she didn't look any worse than Blair, Serena or any other girl from UES, she even had something more, special… warmth, kind of sparkle, unfeigned naturalness, which he really missed in some way. But he wasn't interested in her, that was just objective observation. Still between the lines of conversation, thoughts about Blair came, and he became sadder immediately.

"Are you a fan of ACDC?" Dan asked unawares.

She looked on her chest. "Well I'm fan of good music in general. They represent it so I'm wearing their shirt, but I can't say that I'm a fan. I listen to music a lot, it's true. But I like many bands presenting various kinds of music."

"Like what?"

"Well, from The Cure, Led Zeppelin, Deep Purple, during Radiohead, Coldplay, Foo Fighters, Red Hot Chili Peppers to The Killers, Wakey! Wakey! etc." She listed it in one breath. "I'm certain that I forgot about someone important."

"It's really various."

"Yeah." She shrugged. "Changing a topic, don't you think this place is amazing. I'm so impressed. I never thought that they allow us live in such lovely house. You can feel a history here." She said.

"Yeah, you right. This place is… magical."

"I love historical buildings. Imagining that one hundred years ago someone sculpted front door, or decorated façade or planted trees. I know it silly… I hate when place like this are devastated."

"No, it's not."

"History always fascinated me." She paused. "I'm so excited. In Rome are so many thing to sightseeing. All remnants of the Roman Empire, museums, galleries, theaters, festivals even Vatican…" She pondered a second. "I have to make a list, I won't miss anything."

Dan was amused by her excitement. "Do you like stuff like that? Because honestly… I do."

"Then we have a something in common. Of course I like it. My mom said that I will be the happiest living in the museum. And she surely was right. If you want we could explore the city together. Unless, you have another plans. I won't impose myself, I just thought that it will be nice doing it with someone else, especially when we are alone here."

He wasn't completely convinced about it. He supposed to do this with Blair, but that is never gonna happen, never. Past should stay in the past. He knew that he couldn't stay in his room forever. That's why he answered: "It's great idea. I don't have plans, so I'm totally in. Just be careful, because I can tire you, taking on every event in the city." He joked.

"Really? I don't think I will regret it." She replied squinting her eyes and taking a sip of tea. "Great, I can't wait!"

"So you are a photographer. Did you graduate an Art School, right?" He asked.

"In fact, no. I studied International Relations at the University of Warsaw. I just like taking pictures. With this program was very strange situation, because no one wanted to go. So professor asked me. I had nothing to lose, so I agreed. I'm not professional, but it's not a problem. I will realize tasks and maybe I will learn something useful."

"But family, boyfriend? It's a year, a long time?"

"I'm an orphan and single." She said just like that.

"I'm so sorry. I had no idea." Dan replied abashed.

"Don't be, really. My father died when I was two. My mother and my older brother died five years ago in a car accident. Truck driver was drunk and… you guess the rest probably. People usually are surprised that I talk about this so calmly. I just don't want to be self-pity about it anymore. In a relationship I'm not from a really long time, so it wasn't a hard decision to come here. My friends convinced me that it's great chance. And for a first time in my life I risked, rented my flat and left my ordered, predictable and quiet life." She explained. "And you writer, why you here?" She blinked.

"Well, it's true I'm a writer. I published two books so far and I just got an invitation. That's all story." He sighed.

After a moment she said: "I don't want be meddlesome, but you look dejected."

"Things in my life are very complicated right now." He didn't want talk about it, she noticed that. But he continued. "My parents are divorced for years. My mom lives in Hamptons. I lived with my father and little sister in New York during a high school. Then she moved out, Jenny isn't so little any more, she travels around the world and mostly residents in Tokyo. My father works in San Francisco. Besides it I have a half-brother, and… two foster siblings, but I'm not in touch with them right now."

"I understand. Then what do your sister and father do?"

"Jenny is a fashion designer, dad is a musician, but now he works in recording studio."

"Wow. Creative and successful family." She grinned.

"I love them really much, they are my everything."

"Yeah I can see that. They are lucky that have you." She said pleasantly. "It's getting late. I won't bother you anymore. From Poland isn't so far to Italy, but you probably had pretty tiring flight. She stood up from an armchair. "Goodnight!"

"Goodnight! Thank you for a dinner and… 'tea time'."

"Thank you for washing up." She smiled and went. She turned around on the stairs, holding a handrail "Dan. If you want to talk with somebody, you know where find me. One thing I can promise you – I'm better listener that talker."

Dan simply nodded. He didn't feel resentful about this proposition, rather he felt relief that he had someone here, despite the fact that girl was practically strange for him. That was weird feeling, he knew that, but he accepted it. He sat couple moments more on the sofa. Then he took shower and went to bed.

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TBC, I hope


	3. Chapter 3

**I do not own GG or any of its characters, thank you God.**

**As always, I ask kindly for ****forbearance**.

* * *

**New Beginning**

Chapter 3

The next week Dan passed in a bed – ill. Combination of jet lag, stress, breakdown and sleepless nights in Brooklyn had to end like that. Pola helped him a little. She brought him medicaments and prepared simple meals, but she wasn't officious doing that, just sincerely concerned and caring. When Gustavo and Emma arrived, he was fully health and strong.

"Hi guys!" Emma and Gustavo said loudly together with shiny smiles.

Pola and Dan waited for new roommates impatiently but as seen, they had nothing to worry about. They welcomed another two very pleasant, inviting for dinner, offering help and giving them a quick tour of the house.

Gustavo Gonzalez is Argentinean. Painter or rather drawer. Graduate Art School in Buenos Aires. Tall, muscular, attractive man with gel on the perfectly cropped, fair hair. He had round face with stubble, snub-nose and blue eyes. Always neatly and well-dressed, mostly in one colored T-shirt, slim or regular trousers and sneakers. Already at the first meeting he seemed to be cheerful, sociable and easy to be friend with. And that really was. Emma Waters seemed to be completely opposite to him. She came from South Africa, but her ancestry were Dutch. Aspired, great-looking actress with body like a supermodel. Healthy complexion, strong makeup, tanned skin, long, straight, blond hair with fringe. She loved pink, lavender and purple and almost always wore cute, girly dresses. Mean person would say about her 'Charlize Theron wanna be, just in a cheaper version', but it was so not true. She was friendly, straightforward, funny and so, so sweet. It was impossible to not like her. But the most important thing was that Emma was really talented and had great taste, despite her fondness to 'Barbie colours'.

"So you are dating, right?" Emma asked them forthright, seeing how Dan and Pola sit next to each other on the couch.

Dan smiled. Pola laughed. "No, no, no. We met one week ago, here. And we just liked each other, I hoped." She glanced on Dan harmlessly.

"Em, do not be so nosy. They just made friends like us." Gustavo said. "She tends to imagine things sometimes." He gestured at her.

"No, it's not true!"

"Yes, it is."

"No!"

"Yes!" They bantered.

"OK. Stop. Anyways, I hope all four of us will become friends." Emma added.

"I have no doubts about that." Pola replied. "You are flawless, both of you."

"So, you had extra week in Rome. Did you see something yet?" Gustavo asked.

"Unfortunately. We wanted sightseeing, but I felt a bit poorly last week. So we hadn't a chance… I own her a trip." Dan said, pointed at Pola's direction with fake disaffection.

"Ok. I have witnesses and I can just patiently wait for this." She sit more comfortably on a sofa. "During this time I visited Institutes mine. And his." She pointed on Dan, rolling her eyes slyly. "And found out what is going on with our programs."

"And? Is it interesting? We have a kind of 'familiarization meeting' only next week." Gus asked attentively, looking at Emma.

"I have an year of free vacation actually, because my only duty is making an album with pictures presenting _The Change_, that's a topic of the contest. I have time to May 2013. Then jury will choose the best project. There were also factitively classes about photography, you know useful advices about lights, shadows etc. but when I went on it, I was alone, so Francesca, an instructor, gave me a manual: Photography for beginners… in Italian, and ordered to go away." She shook her head with mocking smile. "I'm going to bore you guys here." She joked.

"Ohh you will Pola, you will." Dan replied getting a punch in lap from her. "In turn, I have a meeting once a month with other writers in an Literature Institute." Dan started. "There we will be presenting our poems or chapters, or looking for inspirations or just talking and exchange the experiences. There is no pressure. If I write nothing, they wouldn't punish me." He blinked. "But I don't think that is wasting time or something, rather a chance to meet new people, get contacts and finding some new motivation to write."

"No offense, but I hope my schedule will be more exciting than yours." Emma said crossing her arms.

"For sure, Em, for sure." Gus said sarcastically.

"I think actors will have more practical tasks. Believe me, boredom isn't threatening you." Pola tried to cheer her up. "By the way, how your rooms? Do you like them?"

"Honestly guys, you didn't leave us a much choice." Emma joked. "Despite this, my room is the best. Big window, bigger bed and the biggest wardrobe. Finally I have enough space to put my clothes in, and of course all new which I'm going to buy." She smiled with excitement, clapping her hands lightly.

"I'm content about my room too. It's spacious, I can made drawings in each size practically. Size of window, bed and wardrobe is right too." He said looking at Emma, laughing.

"Speaking of beds. Pola you have the biggest…" Emma smirked. "Ohh please you two, tell me your status – single, not single…?"

"Single but I'm not looking for relationship." Pola answered without hesitate.

"Same." Dan said trying avoid questions.

"Damn no!" Emma's reaction was so comically serious. Pola started laugh, amused Dan tried stay unruffled.

"I'm gay, if it help you." Gus said, grinning.

"Damn! What!"

All three of them exploded laughter.

"Don't laugh at me. It's very serious, it's tragedy actually. Why gorgeous men are always, I repeat it ALWAYS taken or gay, why?" She defended herself very upset.

"Well life is hard sweetie." Gus said stroking her back. "For everyone… I can tell you that."

She hugged him, feeling guilty because of her childish behavior and making problems from nothing. "Well, I think I can handle that I have no chance, at least with you two." She said smiling playfully.

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Time flies in Rome. In multicultural household rules were clear, friendships grown, social life developed and works went on very well. Dan and Pola met each other first, so obviously their friendship developed the quickest. They found common ground immediately, shared mutual interests, also views about life, art, work.

Pola heard knocking, but ignored it, was a middle of the night though. She rolled on the other side and slept on.

"Hey. Wake up." Dan whispered, sitting on her bed.

"Yyyy…" She put a pillow on the head.

"Wake up!"

"Noooo" She mumbled, kicking him out. "Go away."

He laughed. "I tried to be gentle but… get up!" He shook her arm and pulled a sheet. "It's 6.15. City is waiting for us."

"Not at dawn."

"I prepared a breakfast for you and planned what we are going to do today… and tomorrow, and after tomorrow if we will miss something. Stand up, right now."

"Jesus Daaaaan!" She said, yawning. "You are an oppressor." She gave him a sleepy glare.

"You look like…" He didn't end because had to hide from a flying pillow. "I'm waiting for you downstairs."

"Yeah, yeah I'm sure you are. Give me couple minutes." And she went to the bathroom.

Dan was surprised when she was arriving in the kitchen in long, airy, see green skirt, white camisole and platform wedged sandals, ready to go and asking him. "Is 6.47. What we are going to do so early in empty Rome? You know that everything is closed, right."

"Well. I was sure that it will take you a little bit longer sooo… we have an extra hour." He bit teeth. "You can eat your breakfast not in hurry." He offered.

"Ohh no. I'm not going to waste any second longer. See you in an hour." She grabbed a toast and lay down on the sofa.

Around one hour later. "Hey sleepyhead, we have to go."

"Oh I know. I heard how enthusiastically you stepped down the stairs." She smiled. "I'm ready. We can go." She took her bag and camera of course. He closed the door behind them.

When they came back at night, Pola was superexcited, Dan… exhausted. He just lay down in living room and closed his eyes. That was blissful feeling after all day running around the city.

"Hi Em." She turned to Emma, who was sitting on the couch, reading magazine. "What an amazing day we had today. We were everywhere…"

"Literary everywhere." He disturbed her, still with closed eyes.

Pola ignored him, and continued. "We saw Coliseum, Pantheon, Roman Forum, The Capitoline Hill and Capitoline Wolf, The Palatine Hill, Arch of Constantine, The Spanish Steps, Altar of the Fatherland, Trevi Fountain, The Mouth of Truth." She sighed, tired of counting. "Ehh I took so many pictures, that memory card in a camera is almost full. I will have plenty to choose from."

"Is it possible to see all this things in one day?"

"Noo…" Dan murmured.

"Yes, it is. Only thanks to you Dan, because you are such a riser. By the way, it's not the end we left to later all churches, basilicas, whole Vatican and Villa Borghese of course."

"Of course." Emma beamed kindly.

"Oh Emma listen, we ate dinner in such wonderful restaurant, seafood there, my sweet Lord, unearthly. Necessarily we have to go there all together next time. Grilled calamari marinated in rosemary, olive oil and garlic, I never tested better food in my entire life. Dan please remind me what did you order?"

"Yyyy"

"Ohh yeah, yeah, yeah I remember pumpkin ravioli with almonds and ginger, delicious too. And this dessert, tart with cherries… mmm! If only I could cook things like these." She said dreamily. "Where is Gus?"

"I'm pro restaurant. Gus is in his room. Painting trance or something. Sooo trip was full success." Emma said, enchanted by Pola's joy.

"Ohh yes! Dan is really good planner. Logistic is his competency, definitely. But despite this, tomorrow we have repeat. We skipped also museums, which is unforgivable, where are very interesting exhibitions right now. And Dan remember Vatican, especially Sistine Chapel with frescoes by Michelangelo is my essential need to see. Can you hear me?"

"Yhhy. You demonic city guide." His tone was half playful half serious.

"I think it's time for me. Bye darlings!" Emma said carefully.

"Are you ok? Dan? You look… you look tired?" He just opened one eye and looked at her with 'Really?!' face.

"I'm sorry. I warned you that I could be unbearable and demanding about this all city tour. I know, today was grueling for me too, but it was so entertaining in the same time that I forgot about legs pain." She smiled. "We don't have to continue this tomorrow. We have all year to do that." She smiled hopefully.

"Believe me you are completely bearable. And that was full fun for me too. I'm just little weary. Tomorrow is resting day, ok? But be sure, I didn't give up. We will see everything what we planned."

"Ok, you are right, we both need a rest. Now go, take a bath. You will feel much better."

"I don't dream about anything else. Hey Pola… please tell me that you didn't joke about this legs pain, your heels are killers you know that."

"Not heels, platform wedges and they are pretty comfortable. But all day walking even barefoot can be tough." She said.

"So relief. I felt like a loser in my trainers complaining about feet ache." He confessed, going upstairs.

Later that night, when Pola walked to her room in pajama, she saw open door in Dan's room. He was laying on the bed in his khaki shorts and grey T-shirt, which he was wearing all day, snoring slightly. She took a blanket and covered him gently, turned the light off and closed the door.

.

.

.

In one warm evening all residents spent on the veranda, talking, laughing, drinking wine, light wind cooled them a little.

"I'm going to the kitchen, do you want something from there." Dan asked.

"Yeah, please bring us raspberries from a fridge." Emma asked.

"Ok."

Pola cataloged her pictures. "Hey guys. Look at this." She showed to Gustavo and Emma a laptop screen.

"Good Lord. Somebody dials up a hotness or what?!" Emma started to fan herself. "Jesus, this is good, really good. Give me that!" She grabbed computer from Pola, and scrolled looking for other pictures.

"Hot stuff!" Gus said with approval.

"Ohh there he is. Super hot, rising modeling star. I would love to oblige you…" Emma said still fanning.

Dan interrupted her. "Wait. I'm sorry, what is going on here?" He asked confused, putting bowl with raspberries on the table.

"We are watching your photos. You are sexy mister. Like from a GQ cover, or better, seriously…" Gus said, nodding.

"Exactly! I wouldn't say it any better." Pola admitted.

"Please stop. It's silly." Dan blushed.

"Look." Emma offered, showing him computer screen, but he didn't even bother himself to do that.

"Don't be shy. We never doubted in that, but Pola's pictures… mmm just give us strong evidences." He ended, smirking.

"Oh Pola my dear. This pictures are awesome. Especially these with me!" Emma said very confident, eating fruits.

They all laughed.

"You have to give me, all of them." She ordered and continued admiring photographs.

"No problem, Em. Take what you want."

.

.

.

Summer in Rome was very sweltering, as usual. It was impossible to go outside, stayed inside wasn't better option. They decided 'We are going on the beach.' Emma had one goal – sunbathing. Pola wanted to take unposed pictures in natural scenery. Dan counted on inspiration's influx, the same like Gustavo. On the sandy beach, Emma showed her values in skimpy bikini. She lay on the towel, shining by oil and attracting the male gaze. Gustavo contemplated the nature in trunks, catching the sun's rays and swimming. Dan tried reading, but he couldn't focus on the words, he chose observing people instead. Pola left her things next to friends and got to work. She went among people, children or just along a shore and took picture by picture. If picture was good enough, she showed it to 'objects', usually with asking for permission to publish it in the future. People always gave her smiles and nice comments, some asked for sending photo to them, she never opposed. Emma, Gus and Dan were her 'objects' too, really grateful ones. She took pictures of them everywhere in house during housework, breakfast, dinner, supper, party, talking, sleeping. But only in appropriate moments, when someone didn't like it, she stopped. But that was very rarely, they became accustomed that she pressed camera button on them all the time.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaa! You ass!" Emma screamed when Gus wetted her. She jumped up and chased him, and they run to the water. Pola documented everything.

"I have great photo story." She smiled.

"I'm going to swim." Dan said.

"Ok. I stay here, watching you." She smirked.

"Come on, join us."

"No." She saw that he tried to protest. "Maybe later, ok." She answered.

"I hold your word."

When they came back. They decided confront Pola. Emma started.

"Pola, for God sake, leave this camera and enjoy time with us." She said pseudo mad. Boys were quiet.

"What are you talking about? I am enjoying time with you guys, very, very much." She replied concerned.

"So show it to us! Actually, why are you wearing T-shirt and short on the beach?" She asked.

"Well, let say that I don't like undress myself in front of strange people." She pulled a face.

"What? You have great body."

"It was hard to say even 10 kilograms ago Em, but thanks." Pola tried to joke.

"You are off your head." Emma began maneuvered with Pola's top.

"No, no, no stop, please stop!" She moved away from Emma and improved her rolled T-shirt.

"Fine. I'm sorry, we didn't want to upset you." Emma said surprised. "Just give you some fun here."

"I have fun with clothes on." She sighed. "I'm sorry that I acted so weird. I just feel more comfortable and safe in clothes. That's it. I'm sorry again." After a seconds. "I need to go." She grabbed her shoes and bag.

"No, please don't go. It's my fault. We didn't want to force you to anything. Sorry." Dan said.

"I know, I know. Don't worry, I'm not mad, really. It's just time for me. I have a lot work and I was going to go anyway." She said calmly with broken smile. "Love you, guys." She send kisses and walked away.

.

.

.

At one late night, Pola stepped out from a bathroom and heard worrisome sounds – creaking, rolling glass balls on the floor, hissing.

"Hey Dan. Do you hear it?" She asked when he walked up the stairs ready to go to bed.

He stood and listened. "What is this? Where is it coming from?" He wondered wrinkling forehead.

"Maybe Gustavo is working at something?"

"No. I saw him downstairs. He went to a club with a friend." He accented with smile.

"Really?! Aaa I'm so happy." She beamed excited. But noises didn't stop. She approached to Emma's door and retreated fast.

"Oh my God. I didn't hear it, I didn't hear it." She repeated to herself.

"What? You heard a ghost?" He teased.

"Worse. Emma is having sex, right now." She whispered. "And I overheard it. I hate overhearing people especially when they are having sex."

He laughed. "Oh no. Her bed is on my wall." They went to Dan's room.

"Heh. Well surely they have fun." Pola said with crossed arms, watching how thing on Dan's desk shaking. Dan sighed.

"Is she speaking Dutch?" He asked rhetorically. They both chuckled.

"Come on, I will show you magic." He followed her to her room. "Listen." She closed the door.

"Silence." Dan noticed. She nodded and opened it back, moans, gasps and wails were audible even louder, when she closed them again. "Silence." Dan repeated.

"Here we are safe." She smirked. "Sit down please." She said spraying conditioner on her wet hair and tied them in a ponytail. "I have to admit that you look better, than in a first day when we met. You smile more often and slowly get back a joy, I think."

"I'm trying to be fine. I wish someday I will be fine. But honestly, still things come back to me. Being here with you guys is the best recovery, I can forget about the pain. I have no idea what I would do alone in hotel room. Probably I would die miserably for a botheration and nobody will even notice it." He said, sitting in the one side of a bed, resisting his back on the bedhead. She laid down on the other side of the bed, which was oversized enough to feel at ease for both of them.

"Somebody had to really hurt you… what is extremely sad, because you are wonderful person." She said. Dan looked down. "I meant what I said two month ago. And I have chocolate with nuts as a bribe." She smiled. "And it's not true that nobody cares about you. You have your dad and sister. Us here. Sarcastic but super smart and extremely loyal Gustavo. Funny, pinky lady, who try to lead us to the sexual frustration." She smirked. "And me boring, unsociable, reserved alien." She paused. "You are not alone. If you feel alone I will tell you that being alone doesn't make you lonely. Being surrounded by the wrong people is the loneliest thing in the world." She paused again. "It's not like your last doors were closed and nothing is waiting for you. The future is wild open and you can do whatever, whenever, wherever you want. I know it's hard think about it that way right now. But someday grieve will be over, pain will disappear, wounds will heal. Maybe my theory is too bold, but it is very heartcrushing ending of an one stage in your life, you should leave the past and look for **New Beginning**."

And that was it, he opened up. He told her his whole life, what happened from early childhood to present, every single detail, every memory, more or less important event. Parents situation, taking care about sister, private high school, Gossip Girl, relationships and friendships, all dislikes, affair with a teacher, dad's new marriage, new sibling, college situation, being a father, Jenny's departure, all humiliations, disdains, mistakes, and changes, writing, and of course Blair – nothing less than everything. He described every detail as a fact without valuation. He let her form her own opinion.

Pola didn't disturb him just carefully listen, but she reacted, her face reacted. Her mimicry precisely showed her shock, disbelieving, astonishment, aversion, indignation, but also compassion, understanding and goodwill.

"Now you know my life better than anyone, I didn't realize that I'm such an exhibitionist." He smirked. "Hope, I didn't scare or disgust you."

"You?! Never! I'm just pissed off that things like this invariably happen." She paused. "Just could you remind me where do you come from? Because your story tells that from other galactic, or that you teleported yourself from Middle Aged village. Class division in 21th century civilized United States. I was convinced that is distant past."

"Well. I would say elite and others."

"I'm sorry but _elite_ didn't accept you just because you live in another district of the same city. It isn't normal. And who is judgmental dick then, in my opinion definitely not you. And they claim to be royalty in the country that doesn't even have monarchical tradition, pure nonsense." She said with raised voice.

"Yeah well. I never thought about that this way."

"Let me summary. Your ex-girlfriend and kind of foster sibling for a while just exist. Blond 'somebody's life ruiner' doesn't have to think, work or study. She simply is and admires her own beauty, sometime manipulates other people for entertainment. And this naïve pretty boy Nate, who doesn't even know how much he owes you. About ugly deviant I'm not going to even mention."

He laughed nervously.

"I don't wonna make you think about me that I'm shallow or mean. I just don't get this world, I don't wonna get it. Their lifes are completely different… and completely against my principles." She sighed. "I'm outsider and maybe I understand nothing..." She said hopelessly.

"Are you indignant?"

"Eee yes, you can say that. It's not like I think that my life is better, or that I'm better that them, because I'm not." She said calmly. "I just can't accept unpunished cruelty to other people. Publishing thing on a blog only to humiliate someone, those schemes, enemies, bringing someone's down, emotional calculations, messing ups. No offense, but it sounds like really bad TV show."

"You suggest that my life is creating by awful writers." He said, making sure.

"Yes." She smiled. "But you are a better one. Nothing stands on the way to start creating it on your own."

He nodded, agreeing. "And, and what about…" He was too scared ending question.

She sighed disappointedly, "I was trying to avoid this topic, honestly because I'm afraid that you will hate me."

"What? Why? Your point of view is very important to me."

"I always try to be fair with myself and with other people about other people. I hope you understand what I mean. I'm sorry English isn't my first language so my vocabulary sometimes isn't enough. In Polish I sound more smart, because I use more sophisticated words." She smirked. He nodded with 'no worries' face.

"Well, famous Blair… for me from the beginning was obvious that you two end up together. You had the most in common of all your friends, when you didn't even realize it. For a really long time she denied you, as an important person in her life. But true is that she never could count on anybody besides you. You were only person who really care about her. Maybe because you care about every single person on the planet." She noticed and continued. "You with Blondie in high school were so predictable, almost like in cheap soap opera. But Blair fitted more to you, intellectually, mentally, at least so it seemed. But I have problem with her, after what she did to you. She declared big words about love in school, imagined happy family in the future, prince by her side, she as strong, wise, independent woman, graduate of Yale, blah blah blah. But she failed on every area. First virgin in high school slept with two boys, thought that was pregnant and didn't know with who. Couple years ago, the same situation only that she really was pregnant. No Yale. Repeating absurd declarations of love to this… ugh never mind, even before the wedding. Weird marriage." She saw Dan's facial expression, his eyes were wilder and wider second by second. "Let me finish Dan, I know that you love her. And I don't want to hurt you by this words. Ok." She paused. "I feel truly sorry for her. Because she has no idea what LOVE is, at all. She has bad concept of it from the beginning, she never experienced it before you. And that is very sad."

"What do you mean? Chuck and she just belong together. I should be prepare that she would choose him."

"You believe in this crap too! Propaganda in New York City works better now, than in Soviet Russia during Cold War. And really? Choose? I tell you something… chooses in love don't exist!" She shook her head disbelievingly. "Being with someone without feelings or only because it's a good business, a perfect example your ex step-mother, inconceivable."

"Life is not so simple. Not everything is just black or white."

"Well I can't agree with that. Do right things isn't that hard."

"But everyone makes mistakes, it's part of life."

"Yes, but what is important with making mistakes… learn from them." She said, grabbing cube of chocolate. "In my opinion Blair has erroneous concept about happiness and love. She never experienced right treatment by parents or guy, and she just has no clue what this feelings are. I have a friend, she is 7 years with a guy. When they started dating she was 15. He was her first boyfriend, everything with him was first – hug, kiss, sex, vacation etc. He treats her like a crap literally, including cheating, hitting, insulting, molesting. And she still think that he loves her and she loves him, that that love looks like, and that suppose to be. She grew up with him, she doesn't know other life. She prefers to stay in this sick relation than be single. Here it's similar, in every moment when any doubt or any insecurity appear in Blair's head she runs away to this guy. It's escape from better but unknowing to worst but known. Ironically with him she feels safe only because he guarantees her something known, unfortunately she thinks that it is happiness, but she is so wrong. Her 'relationship' with… you know, is just a habit, pretense and obligation to other people. In my opinion it has nothing to do with real love."

"Obligation…?" Dan was confused a little.

"How you called it? Oh yeah... _Elite _has expectation. He fits to a picture. To her picture too, because she has her own imaginations of life and she tries to adapt reality to them. Beside when Gossip Girl or Serena or Chuck say that she loves Chuck because that means to be and because he is Chuck Bass, she just can't not agree with that, right." She blinked. "She is susceptible to manipulation, when her friends persuade her something she oppose very rarely."

"She rejected me because I don't fit."

"I don't know why. I have no idea why. Every girl in the world everyday dreams about man like you, and I have no clue what possible reason she had leaving you. In real world, I mean outside Upper East Side, this guy has no chances with you." She sighed sadly. After a moment. "You can hate me now."

"I'm not going to hate you. I think I should thank you, because you open my eyes to some things." They heard ring of Dan's phone, he rolled his eyes cheerlessly.

"You don't check this."

"No. It's Gossip Girl post. I get this all the time. It's so upsetting."

She looked surprised. "So stop using it. Delete application and block this site on computer. You could stop avoiding Internet, finally."

"You can do this?" he asked.

"Yeah, no problem." She grabbed his phone. "I always stay out of everything which makes me sad, upset, stress or hurt me. Ignoring things like that is my defensive system." She said clicking iPhone's buttons. "Done. You are free." She smiled.

"Thanks. Ehhh but in spite of all I feel weird."

"Do you want to get these news?"

"No."

"So everything is fine, you will used to it."

"But something is ending… this is the end of big part of my life."

She held out her hand to him. He looked a bit unsurely.

"No worries, it is not a gesture of romantic feelings or something. Holding hands just always helping me, maybe you will feel better too. Bed is big enough, we have our own spaces. Try to fall asleep." When they were laying in dark room with clasped hands Pola said. "Great Love, hyh." She paused. "Sometimes love is very, very big, like the size of a great lake, you loved a girl so, so much that you'd do anything for her. And something happened, and you are sad, because of various reasons she wasn't the one. Now you have options, you can drown in this lake or you can drift vainly or you can try to swim to the shore and there, perhaps, get an opportunity for love which would be ocean-sized. And maybe… maybe jump in it... Good night Dan."

He didn't answer, he just squeezed her hand tighter.

* * *

TBC, I hope


	4. Author note

**Author note.**

Hello my favourite readers ;)

I want to apologize You because of my absence. Honestly I had no idea that someone is waiting for my updates and I could not be more honored. This story was just a cure for me after... I just tried to heal myself... You know. I never expect a response from you guys, that's why Thank You very, very much!

I don't give up. This story is complete in my head. And I'm going to finish it no matter how long it will take me (simply because I don't like to leave things unfinished). I have a hard time at the university, it's my only excuse.

Spoilers for impatient (only next chapter):  
- Pola has a secret - past was very cruel for her.  
- Rufus visits Dan in Rome.  
- Jenny had a fashion show during "Rome Fashion Week".  
- Gossip Girl posts from Rome too (about Dan of course). And someone is very unhappy in NYC or rather very aware of its mistake.  
- Someone has sex with somebody.  
- Someone wins a contest.  
And I will stop here :)

I'm sorry but I can't promise when I will post next chapter. I have only few sentences on paper. But I will do it, for sure.

Thank You so much, once again!


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